You Belong With Me (Permanently): Moriarty + TSwift

Dear sweet baby Jesus. This is without a doubt the most complicated, ridiculous Shrock song I’ve done so far. Thirteen tracks in Audacity, goddamn it. Thirteen. Anyway, I hope that you enjoy and imagine Moriarty dancing around and singing into a hairbrush like TSwift does in the music video. Because I know that I do.

Lyrics:
You’re on the phone with your flatmate, he’s upset
He asked you to buy milk, you always forget
He doesn’t get your genius like I do

I’m in IT, I’m watching you on a screen
I’ve hidden cameras in your flat that you haven’t seen
No one will know you better than I do

‘Cause he wears jumpers, I wear Westwood
I’m pure evil and he’s just so good
I’m waiting for the day when he lets down his guard
And stealing you away won’t be at all hard

Can’t you see that I’m the one who understands you?
Want you for my own, forget Molly
You belong with me, you belong with me

I have you followed everywhere you go
I’ll drop in at Baker St just to say hello
You’d say that I’m obsessed and you would be right
You make it so easy

And you’ve got a brain that would make a neurosurgeon proud
But that boring doctor just drags you down
When you’re with me, you will be greater than great
Once I get rid of your stupid flatmate

‘Cause he saves people, and I kill them
He’s flat broke and I’ve stolen millions
Dreaming ‘bout the day when he lets down his guard
And stealing you away won’t be at all hard

Oh, can’t you see that I’m the one who understands you?
Stalked you fair and square, I’ll make you see
You belong with me

I will find a way to kill your flatmate
Semtex, poison, oh, it’ll be easy
You belong with me

Oh, I remember meeting at the pool in the middle of the night
I know I’m gonna laugh while your stupid doctor cries
I know you’ve got a heart, why aren’t you saving it for me?
If I can’t have you for my own, well then neither can he

Oh, I’ll prove that I’m the one who understands you
Didn’t see this coming, did you, Sherly?
You’re gonna die with me

You’re no angel, neither am I
I’ll pull the trigger and you’ll fly
Baby, you belong with me

Can’t you see that I’m the one who understands you?
Want you for my own, forget Johnny
You belong with me, you belong with me

Oh no, forget Johnny
You belong with me, you belong with me. 

Thank you so much, darling! I do in fact have a Soundcloud account, which has Burn You as well as my two other Shrock songs on it. (Unfortunately, Soundcloud is a butt and download limited Burn You, so you’ll have to download that here.)

Aww, Soundcloud, lame. Welp, have another download link!

Also guys I cannot believe what is happening with this song how does anyone like it every time I look at the number of notes/plays I’m just like

What the shit is happening here you guys I don’t even

Of course! Have the SoundCloud link.

I still cannot believe that anyone likes this what is even happening

Burn You: A BBC Sherlock Parody

(Based, of course, on Cee-Lo’s Forget You. I would like to apologize for the craptastic quality of my recording/editing software and also for my high notes. I am an alto two, so Cee-Lo’s falsetto notes are not ~exactly in my range, but I did my best. Credit for part of the bridge and general lyrical assistance goes to saintdoriangray, thanks so much! Mild spoilers for Reichenbach.)

I see you solvin’ my crimes with my devious clues
And I’m like, I’ll burn you (oo-oo-oo!)
I think you would make such wonderful shoes
And I’m like, I’ll burn you and burn John too
If I wasn’t forgiving, you wouldn’t be living
Oh, but this is fun (isn’t this fun?)
And though you’re awfully cute, I’ll still tell Seb to shoot
And I’ll burn you (oo-oo-oo!)

Hey Sherly, it’s Jim from IT
I had some cute gay underwear
I left my number, but you didn’t call me
Now you know I don’t play fair
I’ll blow up that fool who hangs around with you
(I play with semtex, and now I’m Mr. Sex)
Ooh, I’ve got some bombs for you
Now, run and tell your little doctor friend…

[Chorus]

Hey shorty, it’s Moriarty
Wearin’ Westwood, lookin’ cool
I’ll destroy ya, oh I adore ya
And I look so good in the crown jewels
I’ll blow up that fool who runs around with you
(I play with semxtex, and now I’m Mr. Sex)
Ooh, I’ve got a game for you
You didn’t realize I was insane til now?

[Chorus]

Now virgin, virgin, virgin, virgin, you need to get laid so bad (so bad, so bad, so bad)
Your flatmate’s heterosexual, your frustration is oh so sad (so sad, so sad, so sad)
Don’t shoot, don’t shoot, don’t shoot, Sherly
I owe you, I still owe you, oh-oh-oh

[Chorus] 

Ed 2: Have another download link, in case you are so inclined!